How to love yourself throughout your journey

+ How to attract your dream life & let go of limiting beliefs

How to let go of a limiting mindset

Tell your own story

It’s time to break the cookie-cutter guidelines of society and live a little. If you’re looking to live by your own values rather than society’s, I suggest you stick around and keep reading. The world is full of standard life approaches, cookie-cutter goals and paths that we feel forced to pursue regardless of whether or not they make us truly happy. Our society tells us stories about how the world works and how we fit into it, and we end up repeating these stories to ourselves over and over again and this is what we end up calling “the facts of life.” We try and fit ourselves into these molds, even though deep inside we know we don’t fit in. So in order to fit ourselves in these molds created by society, we are forced to diminish parts of our unique selves and let go of pursuing our true passion.

Many of us go through life, comparing our experiences to our stories, and our brain reacts to these stories rather than reality. If we aren’t careful, we can end up living more in our stories than in our actual reality.

Ask yourself the following questions:

• “Do I feel obligated to pursue my passion?”

• “Do I feel stuck in a lifestyle that doesn’t fit my desire?”

• “Do I constantly feel distracted from pursuing my goals?”

In order to live the life you want, you must wake up to the possibility that you don’t have to try and fit yourself into the old “facts of life.” Be willing to step away from the old stories you’ve been told that are forcing you to accept a limited life.

Mindset is everything

The stories we tell ourselves about life, ultimately becomes the life we end up living. Your stories are the illusions that make your reality. If you tell yourself that nothing you do matters, then it won’t. Every time we tell ourselves a story about how we are less powerful than we truly are, we become less powerful than we really are. It’s a continued pattern with everything in life; where attention goes, energy flows. What we believe we become, so it’s up to ourselves to disregard the limiting beliefs we have in life and focus on gratitude and positivity.

We stick to believing the stories we tell ourselves because we don’t know who would disapprove of us, or who might befriend us. We might stay stuck because we know that so many of our relationships are based on the acceptance or approval from others & believing the same stories. Sometimes we cling to our stories because we fear there is nothing else in our lives and we haven’t quite found our passion yet, so we fear feeling empty.

If you can detach from the stories you tell yourself about how you should or shouldn’t relate to the world, then you will have the ability to relate in a way that comes most naturally to you. In a way that brings joy to you and helps you & others thrive. In order to know this, all you have to do is stop believing you aren’t worthy enough to live your dream life, and unbind yourself from your limiting beliefs.

Let go of what’s holding you back

• Are the stories you’re creating, the life you actually want to live in? Our real world begins to conform to our story world, we don’t choose our stories based on whether they are true or not. We choose them for the effect they have had on us. Maybe they make us feel safe, happy, or stable. Sometimes we prefer the effect of the story, rather than the reality of life. However when this happens, we are no longer free to act from our true selves because we follow the guidelines of our story.

• Without accepting your power, you are in the world without your whole-self, which can be the loneliest state of all. When we hold on to our limiting beliefs, we slowly turn ourselves off from pursuing our dream life. We get so lost in a net of self-imposed obstacles, that we no longer know how to be alive. Turning off the world means turning off ourselves. When we deny our ability to help the world, we’re also denying our ability to help ourselves.

• Once we stop tangling ourselves up, limiting ourselves and hiding our light under our old stories, our action emerges naturally from our true values and our true selves. Then we have a much better chance of helping ourselves and the world. When we choose to live according to our values, people start paying attention & we’re able to disregard our limiting beliefs. We start feeling as though we matter and this allows us to live a happier life.

discover your passion & turn it into your career

- Tap into the real you & make your dream life a reality

The standard life approach is to put career first and then try to fit a decent life around it. Some of us, before we know who we really are, follow the social herd. We accept the idea that we need a lot of money, without even knowing what we plan to use the money for. Like somehow the money itself will fix things, so we hop on the corporate nine to five bandwagon and suddenly we’ve let go of our freedom.

What if we figure out how to live our own version of our dream life, one that fills our real needs to feel secure, makes us feel healthy, lets us feel like ourselves, allows us to express our true talents, and enables us with the ability to relate to others in a meaningful way? Well the solution isn’t as hard as you might think. Really, what it takes to achieve the good life is to tap into your inner self and dive deep into our calling. If you haven’t found your calling in life, maybe try volunteering at an environmental event, watching ted talks on topics you’re interested in, traveling, listening to podcasts, visiting different cultures around the world, networking, creating, or turning to your favorite hobby. There’s inspiration all around us, so take advantage of the self-growth opportunities and discover your passion in life!

You must know yourself before knowing what job you want. By bringing awareness to the smaller relationships with the world; how we eat, what we own, and who we surround our self with, we can learn about ourselves and create our own version of your dream life. First determine the real you and your passion, then build your career around that to create your ideal lifestyle.

Cookie-cutter career

In our culture, when we talk about finding “the good life,” we automatically assume that we’re talking about finding the best career, as though our career is our entire life. We must be careful that we don’t miss the real opportunities to build good and meaningful lives. What if you put more effort into networking with more people? What if you pursued your passion of writing? or photography? What if you learned how to play music? or what if you joined an environmental group? Take the opposite approach to creating your dream life & career. Build a meaningful life outside of work, tap into your true self and discover your passion! Find a career that represents your passion & compliments your own personal version of your dream life.

Go where you’re called

More often than not, we get scared that being ourselves won’t get us where we want to be in life. But if being ourselves gets us there, then that’s where we want to be. It’s important to find a path that’s authentic to yourself, while still responding to the conditions of the world. This is your life and it’s a precious gift, so cherish it and embrace your journey.

Ask yourself:

• Where have I always wanted to go?

• What do I want to learn in my lifetime?

• What do I want to achieve in my lifetime?

• What have I done that I’m really proud of?

• What have I always wanted to do that I haven’t done yet?

How would you spend your energy during a week:

Be proactive & productive with your time so you can accomplish everything you wish throughout your day, week, and entire life. Of the eighty four hours you have each week, what would you like to spend your time doing? Maybe it’s helping the world through your passion, connecting with friends, learning & expanding, creating, nourishing your body, earning money, going to school, visiting family, traveling, spending time in nature, learning new skills, reading and relaxing, exercising, sports, volunteering in your community, or doing errands and life responsibilities?

Trust your vision

Say you have an idea of what your passion is and you’ve taken your first steps toward building the new relationships you want to have with the world. Maybe you’ve also tried steering away from one or more of the standard life approaches. Maybe you’ve even gathered a bit of momentum and success with what you’re doing. Well I have great news, this is typically about the time when critics and second guessers arrive! This is typically about the time people start judging your ideas. However his isn’t the time to leave your passion behind and head back to the rat race. Instead, it’s time to trust your vision and move forward anyway. You may find that the biggest risk you can take in this world is to face the possibility of being publicly wrong, but if you know deep down that you’re pursuing what’s meaningful to you then that’s all that matters.

Change your life & the world

Spend more energy doing what is true for you, and spend less energy toward what doesn’t align with your values. You don’t have to change the entire world, or everything at once. You can’t stop violence in the world by doing violence against yourself. Instead all you have to do is begin to trust your truth and give energy to what is true and take energy from what isn’t true.

The impact of pursuing your passion

What really makes us happy & changes the world is being true to ourselves. Saving yourself saves the world, saving the world saves yourself. Pursuing truth for yourself leads to truth for all. Pursuing the good life means pursuing a life based on truth or achieving what you really want for yourself. This helps liberate others to find their own version of their dream life. This will allow you to move forward, not in a mindset of competition or anger, rather one full of love and compassion. To pursue the good life is to trust that following your own true path also helps others. When you become what you truly want to be, you cannot help but benefit the world in so many positive ways!

Become an optimist

An optimistic outlook has a huge impact as to how long and healthy your life is. Not only does the optimist live longer, but the optimist also has better attention levels, better memory, increased curiosity, better ability to adapt to surroundings, and tends to have a much more enjoyable life. Feeling hope and optimism is an important factor in feeling well.

We are born with a drive not just to survive, but also to live and thrive. The optimist is solution-driven, whereas a pessimist is problem oriented. When problems occur, optimists put their energy into resolving them and visualizing success or a good outcome. This eliminates stress and frustration which avoids high blood sugar levels, reduces inflammation and damage to the immune system. This in turn can stem the development of cancer and cardiovascular disease.

First, you must start with self-awareness

Take a step back, study yourself & your reactions to situations, be self-critical and feel when the pessimism begins to flow. Listen to yourself when you talk about misery in your life & in the world, about everything that makes you angry, sad, and disappointed. Redirect your attention towards hope and positivity. Gain an awareness of how much energy you put into negative things or things that aren’t going so well. Create positive pictures of what you have to be thankful for and begin practicing gratitude on a daily basis.

Tips for becoming an optimist:

• Write everything that you’re grateful for in the present moment, in a journal. Before you go to bed or right when you wake up in the morning, read your words of gratitude to yourself. This will set the tone for the night or your entire day ahead, and will create a mindset full of positivity and optimism.

• Feed your brain positive messages by expressing gratitude & joy, and acknowledge what is meaningful in your life. Embrace everything good that is around you, and express joy for the little and small things in life. This will generate everyday happiness and fulfillment, which is essential for having an optimistic outlook on life.

• You are the average of the top five people you surround yourself with. Surround yourself with positive people, and avoid pessimists who drain your energy. Instead socialize with optimistic people since they radiate energy, possibility and positivity.

• The more you give, the more you receive. When the act of giving is joyful, free flowing, and truly from the heart, then the energy from the giving will increase many times over. Be generous towards others and be just as enthusiastic about other people’s successes as you are about your own.

How to be happier

Buy Experiences & Memories, Not Things

If you’re looking to buy happiness, it’s wiser to invest in experiences rather than things. People tend to be in better moods when they can reflect on their experiences & tell great stories from them, rather than buying materialistic possessions. According to most people, experiences equal money well spent. Buying experiences is especially good for happiness if these experiences bring you together with other people and if they’re tied in with who you are deep down. See experiences as an investment in happy memories and in your personal story and development. If you do buy an experience, make sure you buy it well in advance so you have something to look forward to, and when you’re feeling down it can be a great happiness booster.

The most inexpensive activity that can make you happier is reading, which you’re doing right now. Reading is like free therapy and can spark imagination & creativity. Reading will help free your emotions and can act as an escape from sadness or stress, and acts as a great mood booster.

“No people can be truly happy if they don’t feel that they are choosing the course of their own life.” -World Happiness report 2012

Embrace Freedom with Your Career

Having the freedom to choose what we do with our lives, and the feeling that we are in charge of our destiny is closely linked to happiness. If you’re looking to be in charge of your schedule, become a happy entrepreneur and embrace your freedom of work/life balance. It’s important to not solely focus on possible income when it comes to finding your career or ideal job, instead you should focus more on the amount of freedom, purpose, or fulfillment it will provide for you. You’re going to spend a huge part of your life working, so you should make it something you enjoy!

Choose Kindness

Try an incorporate five random acts of kindness each week, to boost happiness for everyone including yourself. Leave a gift on someones doorstep, talk to the quiet person at school, work, or a party, give someone a genuine compliment, volunteer, find ways to help your community and develop your sense of purpose. If you notice someone needs help, don’t ask them just help instead!

We need people

At the heart of a good, purposeful life lies strong family relationships, friendships, and great work friends. But it’s not the number of friends you have that’s important, rather it’s the quality of the friendship that matters. Having good relationships with a few, are better than having many relationships of poor quality. Good relationships and surrounding yourself with quality people promotes health, happiness, and optimal well-being. The opposite is also true, if you surround yourself with negative people they’ll end up steeling your energy, leaving you feeling drained and full of negativity. Choose the right group of friends and create a healthy social life.

Self-love: How to practice it in every aspect of life

If you value yourself, you’ll make time for yourself.

Self-love tips: Health + Nutrition

• Drink green tea or herbal tea. A cup of tea a day is great for relaxing your mind & body, while also providing a rich source of antioxidants and healthy herbs!

• Become friends with a Naturopathic physician, holistic nutritionist, or homeopath. It’s nice to have a reliable Naturopath doctor and nutritionist on hand, so whenever you notice or feel something’s not right you can figure out the root cause of your issue.

• Eat slowly and don’t have seconds. Don’t just think about what you eat, but also be mindful about how you eat. If you gulp down your food you won’t have time to feel any sense of fullness, and it will be really easy to take seconds since you’ll still feel hungry. This may lead to weight gain, overload your digestion, or upset your stomach and cause indigestion. You’ll likely feel tired and sluggish after eating an enormous meal, so keep it light. (check out my mindfulness page, under the self-educate tab for more tips on mindful eating).

• Eat foods that strengthen your immune system & cure inflammation. This would include eating more antioxidants, omega-3’s, foods low on the glycemic index or gluten-free, and plenty of fiber and probiotic-rich foods. (see my super-foods & supplements page under the nutrition tab, for ideas/facts).

• Get adequate levels of vitamin D. Vitamin D is a miracle molecule that’s needed to keep your body functioning at an optimal state of well-being. Vitamin D is the happiness vitamin and helps with the absorption of essential vitamins and minerals from the gut. Ditch the dairy and soak up some sun to get your daily dose of vitamin D. You don’t have to bake in the sun in order to get adequate levels of vitamin D, and more sun doesn’t mean more vitamin D either. The skin actually shuts down production once vitamin D levels have been topped up. So just spending fifteen to twenty minutes out in the sun will provide you with plenty of vitamin D. Go on a run, go hiking, garden, or simply relax in your backyard to soak up this essential vitamin! If you live in a cooler climate or where winters are dark and snowy, vitamin D deficiency can be common. If you’re not getting enough sun, it’s important to get your vitamin D levels tested and start taking a vitamin D supplement so you’re in good health all year.

3 ways to combat stress + embrace love:

1. Everyday exercise: One of the best ways to recover from stress is to simply get active! Stress raises levels of cortisol and exercise reduces cortisol levels, your bodies natural stress hormone. Once you build up a daily sweat your body will begin releasing a calming hormone throughout your body, called oxytocin, which gives a lovely sense of relaxation.

2. Sleep. It may sound cliche, but it’s truly the best way to combat stress. If you aren’t getting enough quality sleep then you’ll quickly loose energy & effectiveness. You’ll also be worse at problem solving and you’ll likely find it hard to fight even the smallest amount of stress throughout your day. Aim for around eight to nine hours of sleep for optimal health!

3. Learn to forgive. You can’t change the past, so stop fretting and start forgiving yourself. Instead ask yourself, “What did I learn from this situation?” It’s important to forgive others and simply let go of the problem and start fresh. Learning to forgive yourself and others reduces anxiety, tension, and harmful stress.

Self-Care rituals

Develop a morning ritual

Embracing a few moments each morning will put you in a positive mindset and prepare your entire mind & body for whatever your day entails. Sit quietly for five minutes before getting out of bed, let some light into your room and write your intentions for the day in a journal. Make hot lemon water and sip it while you’re getting ready, which will help detox your body, prep your digestive system, and help you feel energized. Create a morning ritual that works for you so you can set a positive tone for the day!

Create a skin-care routine

Skin-care is a really important part in taking quality care of yourself and boosting your confidence. There’s many factors that go into having great looking, glowing skin and many of these factors can be controlled by you. Here are a few basic steps in achieving a youthful glow:

Eat for your skin- Eating a colorful balanced diet is the most reliable route to achieving a healthy complexion. Your skin needs a variety of vitamins and minerals to function optimally, which includes plenty of antioxidants, green tea, fiber, collagen (plant-based), and healthy fats.

Hydration is key- Dehydration means parched skin! Drink plenty of water throughout the day to replenish & hydrate your skin cells. If water is boring to you, spice it up by adding fresh lemon or mint to it.

Supplement- Vitamin C (potent antioxidant for collagen production), Vitamin D, or a whole-food multi-vitamin which will provide your skin with a variety of vitamins & minerals and help fill any nutrient gaps you’re missing.

Embrace humidity- Get in a humid environment every once in a while, such as a steam room. The warm steam will help nourish dry or dull skin and cleanse pores. If you don’t have access to a steam room, try adding humidity to your bedroom at night with a humidifier for dry skin.

Self-care challenge

• Get accidental exercise: Combine travel with exercise! If you enjoy hiking, then you can combine your passion for traveling by hiking in new locations. Or try out yoga and Immerse yourself in new poses and challenges.

• Warm up and relax in a magnesium or Epsom salt bath to relax sore muscles.

• Get a massage to help pinpoint muscle weakness’s or imbalances in your body.

• Try out a new sport! It’s never too late to try surfing, snow-boarding, skiing, horseback riding, golf, rock climbing, running, zip-lining, or even an old sport or hobby you used to do. Explore a new sport or activity and maybe you’ll find a new hobby or passion.

• Dedicate today or a set time each week to learning something new, traveling somewhere new, or experiencing something you’ve never experienced before.

• Meditate for ten minutes daily, either in the morning or evening in pure silence or with soothing music.

• Figure out what your sources of: Abundance, happiness, love, courage, friendship, strength, and laughter are. Do one thing a day that fulfills each of these aspects in your life.

Tips for attracting & living your dream life

“The question isn’t who is going to let you, it’s who is going to stop you?”-Ayn Rand

3 factors to living a successful life

• Have a rich social network of friends & family and build strong communication skills.

• Strive towards having a meaningful & purposeful career. Be excited to get out of bed in the morning, embrace your passion and make it your career.

• Have a resilient personality and recover from challenges, rather than dwelling on them.

Pursue lifetime learning

• Learn something new everyday. The only way you can find your passion in life is learning new things, once you’ve found what resonates with you start learning new things about it everyday.

• Learning on a daily basis shouldn’t feel like a dreaded task, rather a fulfilling pleasure. You can seek out online courses, lectures, webinars, or even listen to podcast episodes to learn something new and interesting.

• I listen to health & nutrition podcasts everyday on my way to school and find them extremely insightful. You can even try out TED (Technology.Entertainment.Design) and listen to lectures by some of the most innovative thinkers in the world.I also enjoy learning new photography techniques whenever I can, because it’s something I aspire at becoming really good at.

Journal your goals & intentions

Journaling provides you with a healthy way of expressing your thoughts, feelings, desires, and emotions. You’ll notice that your ability to work through doubts will improve, and you’ll feel more confident in your plan of action. If you’re looking to experience self-growth, I highly suggest you begin journaling to unleash your goals & intentions. Decide how often you wish to write, establish your vision of what you plan on writing about and set your goals, intentions, and desires in stone. Read your goals & intentions to yourself each day in order to experience as much self-growth as possible.

Unleash your creative side

1. Nurture your creativity and unleash your creative side. Find a group of like-minded people that share your same creatives to help spark imagination and creativity. By interacting with others who share similar artistic or creative passions as you, you’ll gain ideas from others and likely create something unexpected.

2. Find natural inspiration, breath in a breath of fresh air and head outdoors. Spending time in nature will boost your mood, promote confidence & peace of mind, and inspire creativity.

3. Unplug yourself frequently. By unplugging your device and doing a social media detox, you’ll be able to eliminate the constant electric chatter and help free up space for creativity and self-love to flourish.

4. Just go for it: If you feel a limitation to create because of a fear of doing things badly, don’t judge yourself or aim for perfection. Simply start somewhere and you’ll be amazed at where just a little effort will take you!

Keep a travel list

• Traveling helps you gain new perspectives and broadens your worldview. Traveling not only provides an important mental break, but it’s also beneficial for your physical health.

• If you’re someone who enjoys traveling, I suggest you create a list of all the places you wish to travel during your lifetime and check them off as you go. This will help you gain a clear vision of what places you wish to explore and travel.

Do the things you want to do

• Take time for yourself and take a moment to stop doing the things you should be doing and save some time for things you want to do. Often times we get so caught up in doing only work, school, or other forced tasks, that we forget to spend time doing the things we want to do. Make a list of all the things that make you happy or the things you’ve wanted to do for a while, yet haven’t had a chance to do them. Then make an effort to go and do what excites & empowers you!

How to practice self-love, Gratitude & listening to your body

“Caring for yourself is not self indulgence. It is self preservation.”-Audre Lorde